Chat
1

Unqualified Unconditional Unlimited

unlimited

Words are powerful.

I know that to be true. And then sometimes, suddenly I am reminded all over again.

This week a long time friend commented on something I had posted on Facebook.  And her words stopped me in my tracks, because they “felt” so good.  “You are so good at dreaming”. A pat on the back is always nice, but what struck me most was the clarity of language.

Unqualified: Without reservation or limitation.

Here’s the deal: I spend a lot of time qualifying my language when I talk to myself and to others.  If I’m telling myself positive things I’m more likely to say “I am kind of good at” or “I sometimes am good at” or “I can be good at”.  And the difference in how those wishy washy statements feel compared to “you are good at” is huge.  Since I’m consciously and unconsciously talking to myself throughout the day, building some better language habits could really come in handy.  Unqualified language, that’s my goal.

Unconditional: Not limited in anyway, complete and absolute.

Two other times that specific language had a lasting impression on me come immediately to mind.  The first was a college acceptance letter (way back in 1986) that stated that they were pleased to offer me  “unconditional acceptance”.  Unconditional acceptance.  Now that’s something that was music to my angst filled teen self and is still beautiful to hear today.  I desire unconditional acceptance in this world.  I desire to FEEL unconditionally accepted. I want to love unconditionally and give unconditionally and be unconditional in my relationships.  I want to be unconditional in my resolve to go after my goals and dreams.

Unlimited: Boundless, infinite, vast.

Another time a single word got my attention was about 10 years ago when I was getting estimates for a new hot water heater.  One of the estimates was for a tankless system and came with a brochure offering an “unlimited supply of hot water”.  The other bids didn’t stand a chance.  (Yes, I’m an impressionable consumer, more on that here.) An unlimited supply.  Of hot water good.  For me.  Unlimited.  Limitless. That speaks directly to my soul.  Unlimited good, unlimited love, unlimited abundance, unlimited forgiveness, unlimited energy, unlimited ability – yes and yes please.

Unqualified, unconditional, unlimited – these words are big and broad and empowering.  Since I’m playing big this year, and reaching.  I want to be clear that I’m not “kind of” reaching or “sometimes” reaching.  I am committed to unqualified, unconditional, unlimited reaching.  

I’m going to be watching my internal and external dialogue – catching myself slipping into the old habit of the disempowering, qualifying language and correcting myself.  Because unqualified, unconditional, unlimited good is what I want for me and for everyone.

What words really speak to you?

 

facebooktwitterpinterestmailby feather
Chat
0

Who’s in Your 5?

You might have heard the popular quote from Jim Rohn “you are the average of the five people that you spend the most time with.”  I don’t necessarily believe this to be an absolute, but I find it an interesting idea to consider.  And an interesting way to look at my own circle of influence.

What feels most true about that statement is that people in my life influence me, in ways I notice and in subtle ways that I don’t always notice.  And when I am being intentional about directing my path, it really helps me to be intentional about who I am “listening” to.   Especially because, I’ve got to be honest, I’m impressionable.  Perhaps sometimes extremely impressionable.  (I’m the girl who can see a Drake’s truck on the highway and suddenly crave a Ring Ding.)

So, it stands to reason that if I committed to a healthy lifestyle with loads of personal growth and discovery, I would want to have an inner circle with similar commitments, ideally people who are succeeding at these endeavors more than I am.   Which is great.  But sometimes I don’t get enough face time with these genius powerful gurus and I find myself lost in other influences (some might argue that we are living in a consumer driven, immediate gratification time at the moment).  That’s where, for me, social media has come to the rescue.  I intentionally seek and follow people on social media who are speaking my language and already doing the things that I most want to do myself.

It’s works so well for me that it’s a subtle form of brain washing, and I have to remind myself that not “everybody” is having kale for breakfast, making daily gratitude lists and doing yoga, just the people I am following.  I love that my Instagram feed is awash in delicious whole food, inspirational quotes, yoga poses, people in nature, and small businesses succeeding one customer at a time.

And I gotta be honest, even when I’m not loving the way I’m feeling or fitting into my favorite winter clothes, if I’m seeing lots of posts about comfort food and glasses of wine, it’s pretty easy for me to pull the wool over my eyes and keep on doing what I’m doing.  However, when my Facebook is full of posts from some of the people I like best talking about being on day 3, and 5 and 7 and 14 of a cleanse, detox, or health make over, I start to get the itch.  They’re talking my language and they’re calling me home.  (If you’re reading between the lines here, you might have guessed that I’m about to embark on a cleanse, you probably will be hearing more about that in the weeks to come.)

The way I see it, I’ve got big plans and it serves me best to line myself up for success in every way I again, working with all that’s available to me today.  Social media support isn’t replacing the ‘real’ people in my life, and it never will.  However, why not keep my channel turned to what I most want to see and hear?

Who are you listening to? Are they telling you what you need to hear to further your goals and dreams?

 

 

facebooktwitterpinterestmailby feather
Chat
0

Get Behind Me

fear

Funny thing how when I take a firm stand on reaching for some big outrageous goals and a deeper richer life, all kinds of stuff comes out of the woodwork to drag me back.  I don’t know about you, but when that happens to me I can sometimes consider it as a ‘sign’ that I’m going the wrong way and decide to curl up in bed and hide from the world to make other, less bold, plans for myself.

Thing is, I know in my gut that I’m making the wrong call and listening to the wrong voices when that happens. But it doesn’t make it any easier to push ahead.  Happily for me I am getting better and better at reaching out to my support network when I falter.  Not that long ago, I used to only falter in secret, behind closed doors, WAY harder to pick myself up when I’m all alone and in the dark.  Not that bringing my struggles to the light is all that easy either, but the bright side of that is that I have the opportunity to continue on with the course I’ve set for myself, rather than turn around and go back the way I came.

Over the past couple days there’s been a lot of noise in my head.  Lot’s of chatter that started with real deflaters like “who do you think you are to…” , “you can’t even…”, “there’s no way to…”, “look at the mess you make…”, “you don’t have…” and on and on and on.  It felt like the hits were coming too fast to catch hold of, disprove or reason with – it felt like I was sinking.  Fear was trying to run the show.

That’s when I remembered what a dear friend said to me recently when we discussed these sort of internal saboteurs.  She said to tell them to “get behind me”.  I’ve heard these words spoken in a commanding voice during a sermon and when I heard them from my friend, they came through in that same strong voice.  What feels really right about simply telling all of that nonsense to “get behind me” is that it frees me from having an internal debate with myself when those thoughts come up.  I’m not pretending that all of that junk isn’t there – it’s there, but it’s not getting in my way, I’m not walking around it, it is getting behind me and I am moving on.

I am not a biblical scholar but part of the strength of “get behind me” for me comes from it’s biblical context.  Jesus tells Satan to “get thee behind me”. (Luke 4:5-8).  And right now, when I’m feeling like I have some big work to do, thinking of those saboteur voices as the devil/Satan trying to hold me back and slow me down infuses me with much more vim and vigor to plow ahead.

So get behind me – and put it all behind you – and do something really amazing!

Are you finding roadblocks in the way of your January dreams and goals? How are you overcoming them?

 

facebooktwitterpinterestmailby feather
Chat
0

One Word

reach

(spoiler – it takes me more than 600 words to talk about my one word)

Choosing a single word as a place on which to stand for a year is a way for me to focus on a theme and carry it into all aspects of my life. In my coaching work, I would refer to it as a perspective.  Selecting a word is about selecting a new perspective/a new lens through which I can choose to look at my life, my choices and my experiences.  And at the same time the single word is also a beacon, a bright reminder of where I want my focus to be, where I am headed.

That being said, committing to a single word can feel confining and no amount of ‘thinking’ of my 2014 word was getting me anywhere over the past two weeks.  And then, this year’s word ‘fell’ on me, just landed in my awareness when I wasn’t really looking for it.  It was written in my mind’s eye in large deep pink block letters:

REACH

As soon as I saw it, I knew it was my word because it soothed a sense of being lost, almost lonely, that I had been walking around with.  And then… it got even better.  A dear friend and mentor of mine (who is also the one who introduced the one word concept to me several years ago), Sherri Wear, recommended looking up my word in the dictionary, which I did, even though I “knew” what reach meant.  Guess what? Here’s what I found:

 REACH, verb

1. To stretch out or put forth (a body part); extend  

2. To touch or grasp by stretching out or extending  

3. To arrive at; attain: reached a conclusion 

4. a. To succeed in getting in contact with or communicating with

    b. To succeed in having an effect on

Before looking up the word, I had only been thinking about it in terms of the first two meanings, the stretching and grasping business.  The next two meanings blew me away and really upped the ante on 2014.  Because yes, I am absolutely ready to reach out to people, reach for things, to extend myself, to stretch myself for my goals, even to stretch my goals.  Already that’s great meaty stuff that I’m scared to death of excited about for myself.  And then – looking at meanings three and four there is a whole bigger game at play.  Not just reaching for my goals but attaining them, not just reaching out to people but communicating with and having an effect on people, the community, the world.  Not just reaching but arriving. Reaching fulfillment, greatness, abundance, success.  YES – that’s a word I can stand on this year.

I am ready and I want to REACH – reach out, reach up, reach people,make connections, gather knowledge, take risks, light a fire inside people, lead people, go for and attain all the blessings and good that are in the field of possibilities.This year as I plot my course, I will be doing it through the lens of REACH, keeping in mind all of it’s meanings.  Which means asking myself questions like:

  • If I were to reach, what would I do next?
  • Who do I want to reach?
  • Where do I want to reach?
  • How big of a reach do I want?

And that’s just the beginning. I imagine I’ll be doing some stretching in more ways than one.  I can’t wait to see where it goes!  And I want to send out a special thank you to Jodi Zaugg who midwifed this blog post and my first major reach of 2014 into being.

Did you pick a word for 2014? How do you anticipate it will shape your year? Did looking up it’s definition change the game for you?

facebooktwitterpinterestmailby feather